Nothing is often a good thing to do and always a clever thing to say.
      - Will Durant - US Historian, philosopher and writer.

Since we are neither good nor clever, we've decided to start the Mozy blog.

Okay - we're going for a pedagogical approach here, so we're starting with a quick tutorial on how to make your computer less slow.

Now here's some quick background on speed:

Let's say you are trying to retrieve some data from your computer - for example, a segment of text that reads "Help me, Obi-Wan Kenobi; you're my only hope." And let's say you want to get that data very, very quickly. Well, it will take some time, depending on where the data resides on your computer.

Check this out:

Data that lives here...	...will take this long to access
CPU Register	< 1 nanosecond
CPU cache	2 nanoseconds
RAM	50 nanoseconds
Disk	12,000,000 nanoseconds
Somewhere in that pile of paper on your desk	42,000,000,000 nanoseconds

(Note that a nanosecond is 1 billionth of a second.)

Okay - so back to Princess Leia. If your vital message that you needed to get to was on your disk, it would take you lots, lots longer than it would take if it is in RAM or in your CPU cache. Of course, 12 million nanoseconds really isn't that long - but the problem is that it can add up, and the rebel alliance really needs that data.

How does it add up? Well, like most disks, your disk is probably horribly fragmented. What this means is that each time it tries to read a file, instead of reading the whole thing in one nice pass, it's got to hop around all those disk platters trying to piece it together. This makes your whole system behave like a lazy dog on a hot day.

First, let's take a look at a fragmented disk:

Yes, it can get that bad - but understand that disk fragmentation is nothing to be embarrassed about - it happens to all of us (well, not so much for Linux and Mac users). NTFS is the native file system on Windows XP, and even though it doesn't get as fouled up as FAT, it still gets pretty messed up.

Here is another view of the same disk from the perspective the Disk Defragmentation application built into Windows:

Don't fret- we can fix this.

Step 1: Get some glue.

We like to use Elmer's Washable School glue, because it won't ruin your clothes. Plus, we kind of like that scary glue monster on the label (no, it's not just a cow, it's a glue monster.)

Step 2: Glue the fragments together.

Be careful not to use too much - just a fine bead along the edge of the green circuit board should be plenty. Note that Elmer's glue is not conductive, so you won't have to worry about fouling the electronics.

Step 3: Let the disk dry.

The disk will take about 12 hours to dry, but you should let it sit for 24 full hours to fully cure.

Okay, there you have it - your disk is now fully defragmented, and you should immediately begin to notice performance improvements.

Automated Defragmentation

If you are too lazy (or too smart) to manually defrag your hard drive as shown above, you could automate the process as shown below:

Step 1: Hit the start button and 'run' %systemroot%\tasks

Step 2: Double click on the 'Add Scheduled Task' icon

Step 3: Click on the 'Browse' button, but instead of browsing, just type in %systemroot%\system32\defrag.exe and click Open.

Step 4: Continue with the Schedule Task Wizard, and select how often you want this to run. We suggest once a week, at a time when you won't be using your computer. When you get to the last screen of the Wizard, check the 'Open advanced properties' option and click 'Finish'.

Step 5: Add the disk drive you want defragged - we suggest %homedrive% but you can put it whatever one you'd like.

Step 6: Enjoy automated defragged goodness. Note that immediately after your hard disk is defragged, things actually might seem slower because you've cleared out your file system buffers and it'll take a bit to fill 'em back up.